Blogs on back-to-back days?! Has this dude lost his mind?!
Complete coincidence, kids. Don't get used to it. But today is the big day... Super Bowl 50. You're familiar with the storylines. The young gunner Cam Newton trying to win his first chip against the old arm of Peyton Manning. So who will win in this battle of dabby versus flabby? It's prediction time, bitches.
Panthers over Broncos
The Panthers have defied all odds this season, coming one fluky loss to Atlanta away from running the table. When top WR Kelvin Benjamin tore every ligament in his leg before the season began, it looked like Carolina's offense would be putrid, with only premier TE Greg Olsen resembling a threat. But Cam, in true MVP form, put the team on his back, even making previous scrub Ted Ginn Jr. a legitimate star. The Panthers O is definitely one of those units where it's sum is bigger than it's individual parts, and it's an understatement to say that Cam is the glue that brings it all together.
They'll have their hands full with the vaunted Denver defense. The #1 overall D this year equipped with playmakers throughout the field, the Broncos have excelled at making top-tier offenses look mediocre. The issue here is Carolina has beaten Arizona and Seattle in the postseason so far, and those two teams, although not ranked as high as Denver, are also known for their punishing defenses. Many think Cam, in his first Super Bowl trip, will have his hands full with the Denver D, but actually I think it's the complete opposite.
However, the game is really going to come down to Denver's offense vs. Carolina's defense. Much has been said about Peyton's season. Dead arm against the strong winds of the winter, mixed with a injured foot lead to the opening of the Brock Osweiler show. While Brock looked serviceable, even at the age of 39, Peyton gives Denver the best chance to win. And that almost 40-year-old arm will be the key to this game. Sailing cream puffs to a Carolina D that picked MVP candidate Carson Palmer four times, including taking one to the house, is not a recipe for victory. Peyton needs his arm to become bionic in what could be his last rodeo. I don't see it. The Panthers are steamrolling teams right now and I don't believe Denver has the firepower to keep up.
The interesting piece will be how Peyton's legacy goes down if he does indeed lose. Dan Marino would be the first to tell you that he'd trade in all his legendary stats for just one ring, but for Peyton to get to the big show four times and only leave with one ring would be disappointing. For any ordinary QB, not a big deal, but for someone in the all-time QB discussion, that could be a devastating blow. For that reason, and the fact that he's Eli's big bro, my heart is with Peyton. But my mind is with Cam and the Panthers.
Carolina 34, Denver 21
Enjoy the game, pendejos. Be safe and easy on the pizza.
Showing posts with label Football. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Football. Show all posts
Sunday, February 7, 2016
Sunday, February 1, 2015
MY SUPER BOWL PREDICTION!
The big game is amongst us. Get fired up! OOOOHHHHH YEAAAAAHHH!
Can we clap for a blogger with his bloggin' ass? I am 8-2 so far this postseason, which is pretty impressive considering that many of these games were evenly matched. Of course, I needed a historic Green Bay collapse to get to this point (poor Packers) but sometimes you need a lil luck (and not enough Andrew Luck) to succeed.
With the match-up set, let's see if I could lock down my 9th win and show the world who the real football guru is.
Let's do this...
Seahawks over Patriots
Vegas has this as a 1 point spread. And I can see why. These are the #1 seeds in each conference, both sizzling hot, both with the pedigree to claim the throne. The Pats, under Brady and Belichick, have been to the big show five times previously, making this their impressive sixth trip. They've taken home the trophy three times. While Seattle, under their current regime, doesn't have that past, they are the defending champs who embarrassed a far more impressive Denver squad a year ago. While New England is more well-rounded, Seattle plays to it's strengths, namely defense and a ferocious running game. It just so happens that those are usually the key elements to victory.
Let's re-visit the Pats two Super Bowl losses... and not just because I'm a Giants fan. OK, maybe it is because I'm a Giants fan, but that doesn't make the point I'm about to make any less valid. The way the underdog G-Men beat New England was simple... hit Tom Brady in the fuckin' mouth. I don't care how much of a world class quarterback you are, as Peyton Manning proved last year... you get enough pressure, you will fold. Well, unless you're Eli Manning against the Niners in the NFC Conference Championship game in 2012. But that's neither here or there. I can't see Seattle deviating too much from the Giants' blueprint, especially considering that's their style of play anyway.
Overall, Seattle is just a bad match-up for New England. Most experts have predicted a close game. I see the Seahawks winning by double digits.
Seattle 27, New England 17
So now only one question remains... ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL?! Enjoy the game, y'all.
Can we clap for a blogger with his bloggin' ass? I am 8-2 so far this postseason, which is pretty impressive considering that many of these games were evenly matched. Of course, I needed a historic Green Bay collapse to get to this point (poor Packers) but sometimes you need a lil luck (and not enough Andrew Luck) to succeed.
With the match-up set, let's see if I could lock down my 9th win and show the world who the real football guru is.
Let's do this...
Seahawks over Patriots
Vegas has this as a 1 point spread. And I can see why. These are the #1 seeds in each conference, both sizzling hot, both with the pedigree to claim the throne. The Pats, under Brady and Belichick, have been to the big show five times previously, making this their impressive sixth trip. They've taken home the trophy three times. While Seattle, under their current regime, doesn't have that past, they are the defending champs who embarrassed a far more impressive Denver squad a year ago. While New England is more well-rounded, Seattle plays to it's strengths, namely defense and a ferocious running game. It just so happens that those are usually the key elements to victory.
Let's re-visit the Pats two Super Bowl losses... and not just because I'm a Giants fan. OK, maybe it is because I'm a Giants fan, but that doesn't make the point I'm about to make any less valid. The way the underdog G-Men beat New England was simple... hit Tom Brady in the fuckin' mouth. I don't care how much of a world class quarterback you are, as Peyton Manning proved last year... you get enough pressure, you will fold. Well, unless you're Eli Manning against the Niners in the NFC Conference Championship game in 2012. But that's neither here or there. I can't see Seattle deviating too much from the Giants' blueprint, especially considering that's their style of play anyway.
Overall, Seattle is just a bad match-up for New England. Most experts have predicted a close game. I see the Seahawks winning by double digits.
Seattle 27, New England 17
So now only one question remains... ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL?! Enjoy the game, y'all.
Sunday, January 18, 2015
NFL CONFERENCE CHAMPIONSHIP PREDICTIONS!
Brady. Rodgers. Wilson. Luck?
Yes, Andrew Luck. Talking about making the leap. Luck and his Colts knocked off the Broncos in upset fashion last week, to the chagrin of many, including myself, as a Denver win would've had my playoff record at an impressive 7-1. The loss caused major ripples in the Denver sea, including the team mutually agreeing to part ways with head coach John Fox (or in other words, they fired his ass). Really wanted to see Peyton try to get that elusive second ring which seems to be the only thing keeping him from being considered the greatest quarterback of all-time. Greatest regular season QB ever? Sure. But with so many epic signal callers in the past (and present), it's tough to put Peyton on the top of that list with such a mediocre postseason history.
While the Colts were a mild surprise, the other teams are usual suspects. Brady and his Pats are more than familiar with this stage, winning three rings and playing in the big game five times since 2002. (refresher, those two losses were to my NEW YORK GIANTS! Weeeheeee!) Rodgers and the Pack took home the hardware in 2010 and have had multiple playoff appearances since. Russ Wilson and the Seahawks are looking to be the first team to go back-to-back since the Pats ten years ago. Can Luck make the Super leap? Lots of intriguing storylines going into today.
And the picks...
PATRIOTS over Colts
So I guess this answers my last question. Andrew Luck is now comfortably in the upper echelon of current QB's after two impressive playoff wins. While a win against the Bengals isn't an incredible feat, to beat a rested, heavily-favorited Denver team and do it on the road was a head-turner. Sure, Indy's defense (and Peyton's horrible arm) had a lot to do with the victory, but with Luck at the healm, any game is winnable. Beating the Pats in New England in January would be a tough task for anyone, let alone a young QB still getting his postseason feet wet. As much as I don't want to see it, I expect the golden boy and hoody to confuse Luck enough to win by a touchdown.
SEAHAWKS over Packers
I know I'm going chalk here but doesn't a Pats/Hawks Super Bowl seem inevitable? Trust me, I'd much rather see Colts/Packers but I can't see it, especially not in this game. A hobbled Rodgers was enough to conquer the Cowgirls last week (Thank God) but this isn't a home came against a notoriously underwhelming team. This is a road test against Seattle's vaunted defense, on the verge of a repeat appearance to the big show. Don't think Rodgers has enough legs... and I don't think Green Bay's defense has enough cojones to stop Young Russ. I'll be cheering for stud WR's Jordy Nelson and Randall Cobb, celebrated members of my fantasy teams the past two years, but I see the Hawks winning easily.
So there you have it... two of the final three games of the NFL season. I'll be back in two weeks with my SUPER BOWL PREDICTION! Enjoy the games, amigos.
Yes, Andrew Luck. Talking about making the leap. Luck and his Colts knocked off the Broncos in upset fashion last week, to the chagrin of many, including myself, as a Denver win would've had my playoff record at an impressive 7-1. The loss caused major ripples in the Denver sea, including the team mutually agreeing to part ways with head coach John Fox (or in other words, they fired his ass). Really wanted to see Peyton try to get that elusive second ring which seems to be the only thing keeping him from being considered the greatest quarterback of all-time. Greatest regular season QB ever? Sure. But with so many epic signal callers in the past (and present), it's tough to put Peyton on the top of that list with such a mediocre postseason history.
While the Colts were a mild surprise, the other teams are usual suspects. Brady and his Pats are more than familiar with this stage, winning three rings and playing in the big game five times since 2002. (refresher, those two losses were to my NEW YORK GIANTS! Weeeheeee!) Rodgers and the Pack took home the hardware in 2010 and have had multiple playoff appearances since. Russ Wilson and the Seahawks are looking to be the first team to go back-to-back since the Pats ten years ago. Can Luck make the Super leap? Lots of intriguing storylines going into today.
And the picks...
PATRIOTS over Colts
So I guess this answers my last question. Andrew Luck is now comfortably in the upper echelon of current QB's after two impressive playoff wins. While a win against the Bengals isn't an incredible feat, to beat a rested, heavily-favorited Denver team and do it on the road was a head-turner. Sure, Indy's defense (and Peyton's horrible arm) had a lot to do with the victory, but with Luck at the healm, any game is winnable. Beating the Pats in New England in January would be a tough task for anyone, let alone a young QB still getting his postseason feet wet. As much as I don't want to see it, I expect the golden boy and hoody to confuse Luck enough to win by a touchdown.
SEAHAWKS over Packers
I know I'm going chalk here but doesn't a Pats/Hawks Super Bowl seem inevitable? Trust me, I'd much rather see Colts/Packers but I can't see it, especially not in this game. A hobbled Rodgers was enough to conquer the Cowgirls last week (Thank God) but this isn't a home came against a notoriously underwhelming team. This is a road test against Seattle's vaunted defense, on the verge of a repeat appearance to the big show. Don't think Rodgers has enough legs... and I don't think Green Bay's defense has enough cojones to stop Young Russ. I'll be cheering for stud WR's Jordy Nelson and Randall Cobb, celebrated members of my fantasy teams the past two years, but I see the Hawks winning easily.
So there you have it... two of the final three games of the NFL season. I'll be back in two weeks with my SUPER BOWL PREDICTION! Enjoy the games, amigos.
Sunday, January 4, 2015
NFL Wild Card Weekend Predictions!
First off... HAPPY NEW YEAR, SMUTS!
If this is the first time you've been insulted in 2015, pat yourself on the back, you over-privileged lil turd. And digest that second insult while you're at it. (BTW, my new year's resolution was to be nicer. So much for that.)
I know I haven't posted since February. But new year... same me. Let's not pretend that this year is going to be any different. I always post heavy in January, only to fizzle out by March. I make no promises that I'll be able to keep up throughout the year so enjoy these posts while they're here.
The good news is... I come bearing predictions! This was one of the staple's of this blog when I first created it so I decided to bring it back because... really, I was bored as shit this morning. But my boredom is your delight! Now let's stop the foreplay and get straight to the action.
PANTHERS over Cardinals
We see this often enough. A team gets into the playoffs with a mediocre record because they won their shitty division, only to be rewarded with a home game and, usually, a victory. In some cases, it comes as a huge upset, like Seattle did to New Orleans in 2011. In this case, Carolina is nearly a touchdown favorite over the Ryan Lindley(?!?) led Cardinals. It is entirely possible that Carolina blew their load last week, with their 34-3 torching of the suspect Falcons. It is probable, however, that Lindley takes a massive shit all over BOA stadium as the Panthers defense realizes their potential from last year.
STEELERS over Ravens
This is the prediction I feel least confident about, so don't bite my head off if I'm wrong. With star running back Le'veon Bell sidelined, it will be up to Big Ben to light up the Baltimore secondary. And that is exactly what I plan for him to do. Antonio Brown and Martavius Bryant should dominate tonight and maybe undrafted rookie Josh Harris gives them enough of a punch to hold on. If Pittsburgh advances and Bell is able to return, this will officially become the team you don't want to face going forward.
COLTS over Bengals
And now to the game I feel the most confident about. Did you see last year's playoffs? The one that Andrew Luck led his team back from a 28-point deficit against the Chiefs? Or the one that Andy Dalton completely SUCKED in again? I know there will be numerous big names on the field for this game... TY Hilton and AJ Green, to name two... but nowhere will there be as big of a mismatch as at the quarterback position. Have ultimate faith in Luck, who followed up his playoff success last year with a massive statistical year this season. Dalton? Still waiting for his first playoff win. And he will keep waiting after this weekend.
COWBOYS over Lions
If you only knew how much I want to pick against the Cowboys here. I was hoping perennial chokers Dallas would face a stiff test in the first round of the playoffs. But noooooooo. The Lions are not short of talent, but somehow the sum of their parts is less than their equal. (I am 98% sure that didn't make any sense.) The only hope Detroit has is that their pass rush rattles Romo, but with Dallas sporting one of the, if not the best offensive line in the game, I expect the Cowboys' offense to put up some serious points. In the second round, I guarantee I am picking against Dallas... but for now, give me the Cowboys, and I don't think it will be close.
First post of 2015 in the books! Lots of good shit to follow, though. My annual 'favorite songs of the year' countdown, favorite album of the year (guarantee you will never guess), worst songs of 2014 (so many to name), as well as more NFL playoff predictions. So stay tuned, amigos!
If this is the first time you've been insulted in 2015, pat yourself on the back, you over-privileged lil turd. And digest that second insult while you're at it. (BTW, my new year's resolution was to be nicer. So much for that.)
I know I haven't posted since February. But new year... same me. Let's not pretend that this year is going to be any different. I always post heavy in January, only to fizzle out by March. I make no promises that I'll be able to keep up throughout the year so enjoy these posts while they're here.
The good news is... I come bearing predictions! This was one of the staple's of this blog when I first created it so I decided to bring it back because... really, I was bored as shit this morning. But my boredom is your delight! Now let's stop the foreplay and get straight to the action.
PANTHERS over Cardinals
We see this often enough. A team gets into the playoffs with a mediocre record because they won their shitty division, only to be rewarded with a home game and, usually, a victory. In some cases, it comes as a huge upset, like Seattle did to New Orleans in 2011. In this case, Carolina is nearly a touchdown favorite over the Ryan Lindley(?!?) led Cardinals. It is entirely possible that Carolina blew their load last week, with their 34-3 torching of the suspect Falcons. It is probable, however, that Lindley takes a massive shit all over BOA stadium as the Panthers defense realizes their potential from last year.
STEELERS over Ravens
This is the prediction I feel least confident about, so don't bite my head off if I'm wrong. With star running back Le'veon Bell sidelined, it will be up to Big Ben to light up the Baltimore secondary. And that is exactly what I plan for him to do. Antonio Brown and Martavius Bryant should dominate tonight and maybe undrafted rookie Josh Harris gives them enough of a punch to hold on. If Pittsburgh advances and Bell is able to return, this will officially become the team you don't want to face going forward.
COLTS over Bengals
And now to the game I feel the most confident about. Did you see last year's playoffs? The one that Andrew Luck led his team back from a 28-point deficit against the Chiefs? Or the one that Andy Dalton completely SUCKED in again? I know there will be numerous big names on the field for this game... TY Hilton and AJ Green, to name two... but nowhere will there be as big of a mismatch as at the quarterback position. Have ultimate faith in Luck, who followed up his playoff success last year with a massive statistical year this season. Dalton? Still waiting for his first playoff win. And he will keep waiting after this weekend.
COWBOYS over Lions
If you only knew how much I want to pick against the Cowboys here. I was hoping perennial chokers Dallas would face a stiff test in the first round of the playoffs. But noooooooo. The Lions are not short of talent, but somehow the sum of their parts is less than their equal. (I am 98% sure that didn't make any sense.) The only hope Detroit has is that their pass rush rattles Romo, but with Dallas sporting one of the, if not the best offensive line in the game, I expect the Cowboys' offense to put up some serious points. In the second round, I guarantee I am picking against Dallas... but for now, give me the Cowboys, and I don't think it will be close.
First post of 2015 in the books! Lots of good shit to follow, though. My annual 'favorite songs of the year' countdown, favorite album of the year (guarantee you will never guess), worst songs of 2014 (so many to name), as well as more NFL playoff predictions. So stay tuned, amigos!
Sunday, December 25, 2011
* MOST AMAZING TOUCHDOWN EVER *
You know it's special if I put asteriks around the title.
Courtesy of Jerome Simpson of the Cincinatti Bengals. Keep going ham, my g
Courtesy of Jerome Simpson of the Cincinatti Bengals. Keep going ham, my g
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Madden Super Bowl Sim
I will be posting my prediction column very soon (did I mention I'm 8-2 so far?) but until then, here's what the Madden video game simulated.
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