Greetings, mutants!
As you may (or should) have read by now, my favorite 30 songs of 2015 are in the books. Awesome anthems like 'Bad Blood', 'I Can't Feel My Face' and 'Uptown Funk' made last year magical. But not magical enough. Sadly, musical geniuses like Taylor Swift, The Weeknd and Bruno Mars were outnumbered by tone deaf trolls who continue to pollute the airwaves with their over-saturated tunes.
In an effort to highlight the biggest offenders, last year I began to list my LEAST favorite songs of the year. Because they need some love, too. And I'm not gonna lie... I am starting to enjoy this more than listing my actual favorites. This is like my therapy... being able to pound on the keyboard and shit on all these scam artists posing as recording artists.
Well, my friends, this year will be no different. My wrath will be unleashed once again! *clears throat* OK quick reminder... I only focused on songs that were mainstream relevant. No need to point the finger on some fucktard's mixtape that he's harassing tourists to buy in Times Square. The bigger the impact these songs made, the more likely they were to piss me off.
It's go time. I present to you... my least favorite songs of 2015.
Fetty Wap 'Trap Queen'
From the moment I heard this travesty, I knew it would be on this list. The fact that this is arguably one of the biggest hits of 2015 is an indictment on how dumbed down the audience has become. Fans of this trash are going to say I am unreasonably sour on this song but tell me, what do you like about it? Is it the off-key belting? Or maybe it's the solid content, praising birds who handle drugs for their scumbag boyfriends? Oh, that's right... it's catchy. If you have this on your playlist, there's a warm place in hell for your tasteless ass.
Pitbull feat. Ne-Yo 'Time Of Our Lives'
After appearing on my top songs of the year list repeatedly, Pitbull appeared on the worst song list last year for his collaboration with that skank Ke$ha. Now he drags poor Ne-Yo into the mix with one of the worst written songs of '15. Here's the gem of a chorus:
I knew my rent was gon' be late about a week ago
I worked my ass off, but I still can't pay it though
But I got just enough to get up in this club
Have me a good time, before my time is up
Wonderful message. Hey kids, fuck your rent... go to the club and waste your money on overpriced alcoholic beverages while you listen to rubbish like this!
Meghan Trainor 'Dear Future Husband'
I really wanted to put anything this culture vulture sings but I will narrow it down to one of her corny ass songs. Ever since I heard 'All About That Bass', I knew this snowflake was up to no good, defacing old school soul music by slapping a big, fat pasty face on it. It's a shame we struggle to highlight black soul singers but are quick to promote melanin-challenged muthafuckas like this who are nothing but cheap imitations. Speaking of which...
Charlie Pugh feat. Meghan Trainor 'Marvin Gaye'
You thought you were off the hook, Meghan? Well not so fast! Now your equally annoying sidekick is gonna get some, too. It's one thing ripping off black music, but then having the audacity to use a legendary black singer as the title of the song? Oh no he didn't. Yeah, I know Charlie, you were aight on that Wiz track and maybe your chorus made a few folks shed some tears for Paul, but that doesn't earn you a 'get out of jail free' card. 'Let's Marvin Gaye and get it on?' Both of you, go somewhere deserted and take your watered down, soul-lacking 'soul music' with you.
Usher feat. Juicy J 'I Don't Mind'
Just when you thought Pitbull & Ne-Yo had the 'worst written song of the year' award wrapped up, here comes this little gem. So apprarently, this song is about dating a stripper and being able to see past the obvious obstacles because, despite her shaking her culo in front of a bunch of derelicts, she's still leaving the club with you. And you know what? I'm willing to look past that, because there are a handful of dancers who are swallowing their pride so they can put themselves through school or feed their kids. But here's the problem...
'I make enough for the both of us, but you dance anyway'
Yes, that's an actual lyric from this shit-fest of a song. Ursher makes it clear that his income can comfortably support himself and this trick, but she still chooses to drop down and get her eagle on for singles. And here I thought stripping was a last resort to make some money. How foolish!
Rihanna & Kanye West feat. Paul McCartney 'Four Five Seconds'
Kanye West is married to Kim Kardashian... and I HATE Kim Kardashian. That association alone could land this song on this list. The biggest reason? Kanye's awful singing. Look, everybody can't be Drake. And really, why would someone as talented as Kanye want to follow that blueprint anyway? That singing shit ain't for everyone. To make matters worse, Rihanna slayed the track. Take out Yeezy, factor in the Beatles connection and RiRi might be taking home a grammy. You hear that, Kanye? You just cost Rihanna a grammy. Selfish prick.
Drake & Future 'Jumpman'
Speaking of Drake, what the fuck was this? Is this what the kids are listening to now-a-days? This is another case of addition by subtraction. Admittedly, this song would've avoided this list with just Drizzy. But just like practically everything in life, Future ruins it. What is the obsession with this dude? He sounds like someone with down syndrome being autotuned. Google the lyrics to this rubbage and tell me if I'm missing something. I know style has always played a big part in rap music but when it's 95% style and 5% substance, something has gotta change.
I think I got enough off my chest for one year. Let this be a message to all artists, regardless of genre... I'm watching you. Drop some basura in 2016 and I'm gonna be on yo' ass. GeeQue, out.
Showing posts with label pitbull. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pitbull. Show all posts
Saturday, February 6, 2016
Tuesday, January 27, 2015
My least favorite songs of 2014
OMG there's a blizzard outside! Ahhhhh!
Well... not really.
I used to think NYC was gangsta. However, here I am, in a big city that's shut down because of flurries. It got me a day off from work so I'm not complaining, just disappointed in the thoroughness of my hometown. Man up, sissies.
The good news is you get this blog as a treat! A few days ago, I posted my annual 'favorite songs of the year' blog. If you haven't read it, GO NOW. It's splendid. But for the first time, I'm gonna do the yin to that yang. That's right... my LEAST favorite songs of 2014.
I know, I know... this list could be endless. I plan to use laser-like focus and shine the (dim) light on a select few that pissed me off the most. I'm sure there's plenty of unpopular songs that suck just as much as the mainstream ones, but picking on those lil-known jams wouldn't be right. I ain't no bully, y'all. The songs below can be considered hits in some regard, and by hits I mean I wanted to hit my head against the fuckin' wall whenever I heard them. Because they were played non-stop on the radio, they deserve the lashing they're about to get. Justice is about to be served.
Let's cue the garbage...
Rich Gang 'Lifestyle'
Migos 'Handsome & Wealthy'
I grouped these two songs together for a few reasons. One, they're equally horrible. Two, they represent a genre who supplied the majority of shitty music in '14. Three, I can't understand a word that either of these ass clowns are saying. I set my alarm to Power 105 in the AM and guess what I usually woke up to? This toxic waste. No wonder I was aggravated before I even set foot in the shower. Twenty years ago, I was listening to a young, illmatic Nas. 'Ready To Die', arguably the greatest hip-hop album ever dropped. The Wu were branching out with their solo projects after their monumental debut. Two decades later, I'm listening to rappers who sound like they have down syndrome. Seriously, these idiots aren't even audible. I've listened to the chorus of 'Lifestyle" carefully and I made out three words, max. Rap world, this is unacceptable. Step your effin' game up.
Iggy Azalea feat. Charli XCX 'Fancy'
First things first, you're the wackest. Have you heard this fraud speak in an interview? SHE'S AUSTRAILIAN. Why is she sounding so stereotypically 'urban' on all of her wack ass songs? This is a straight-up mockery of the culture and I won't stand for it. I feel bad for Charli XCX's fine ass who had to try and save this shit with the only thing salvageable about it, the chorus. Even with the vailiant effort, this was still a fail. Oh yeah, I hated 'Black Widow' too, beeyotch.
Jessi J feat. Ariana Grande & Nicki Minaj 'Bang Bang'
The inclusion of this song is important because A) I hate the song and B) I hated everything the featured artists dropped last year. 'Problem', 'Break Free', 'Anaconda'... HATED IT ALL. How anyone can listen to Ariana Grande's voice without their ears bleeding is beyond me. Nicki sounding like a psycho slut on every record? Yawn. And then this catastrophe. Save yourself from these pitiful puppets, Jessi J. Good thing I don't own a firearm or it would be 'bang bang' for real for real. *thug voice*
Pitbull feat. Ke$ha 'Timber'
Pitbull, mi primo! Que paso? For years, you've entertained the universe with your electric energy. But last year? No bueno. Your chants of 'Dale' were finally starting to get stale. Your beat selection, usually top notch, was bottom shelf. And then you got this trashy hoe to sing this horrible hook. Your last album, 'Globalization', was a sign that there might be a sudden end to your Cuban reign. I know this song wasn't on there but it was still the biggest turd you dropped in '14. Ay Dios mio.
Magic! 'Rude'
Just what I wanted to hear, a bunch of reggae-influenced Canadians whining about their future father-in-law. No wonder he doesn't want you to marry his daughter... because of garbage like this. Shit, I'd be rude too if this was my potential son-in-law's plea. I have a handful of Caribbean-themed songs on my iPod but I can assure you, this ain't one of them. The real magic would be if we could make these fucktards disappear.
Jason Derulo 'Trumpets'
Can this guy dance? Sure. Am I hating on him because he was boning that goddess Jordin Sparks? Maybe a lil. But that doesn't change the fact that this is one of the most poorly-written songs in recent memory. 'Is it weird that your ass remind me of a Kanye West song?' Yes, it's fuckin' weird. And borderline homosexual. Why the hell would you write (or sing) such a thing? The songwriter should be banned from ever lifting a pen in his lifetime.
John Legend 'All Of Me'
And here is where the female demographic loses their shit. I fully expect riots over this selection but guess what? I DON'T CARE. Let's call a spade a spade. I love a beautiful ballad as much as the next person, but this overly sappy, insincere ode to his overrated wife? No thank you. I want that Luther-type shit, feel me? I'm sure this song will be played at weddings for years to come, and if you're planning to play this at your ceremony and you want me there, I'M NOT COMING.
OK, let me stop there. I feel my blood pressure rising and I'm not trying to catch a heart attack over a blog. While I take some deep breaths, I hope you enjoy the rest of the day, especially my fellow NYers who are 'snowed in'. *Rolls eyes* Peace, punks.
Well... not really.
I used to think NYC was gangsta. However, here I am, in a big city that's shut down because of flurries. It got me a day off from work so I'm not complaining, just disappointed in the thoroughness of my hometown. Man up, sissies.
The good news is you get this blog as a treat! A few days ago, I posted my annual 'favorite songs of the year' blog. If you haven't read it, GO NOW. It's splendid. But for the first time, I'm gonna do the yin to that yang. That's right... my LEAST favorite songs of 2014.
I know, I know... this list could be endless. I plan to use laser-like focus and shine the (dim) light on a select few that pissed me off the most. I'm sure there's plenty of unpopular songs that suck just as much as the mainstream ones, but picking on those lil-known jams wouldn't be right. I ain't no bully, y'all. The songs below can be considered hits in some regard, and by hits I mean I wanted to hit my head against the fuckin' wall whenever I heard them. Because they were played non-stop on the radio, they deserve the lashing they're about to get. Justice is about to be served.
Let's cue the garbage...
Rich Gang 'Lifestyle'
Migos 'Handsome & Wealthy'
I grouped these two songs together for a few reasons. One, they're equally horrible. Two, they represent a genre who supplied the majority of shitty music in '14. Three, I can't understand a word that either of these ass clowns are saying. I set my alarm to Power 105 in the AM and guess what I usually woke up to? This toxic waste. No wonder I was aggravated before I even set foot in the shower. Twenty years ago, I was listening to a young, illmatic Nas. 'Ready To Die', arguably the greatest hip-hop album ever dropped. The Wu were branching out with their solo projects after their monumental debut. Two decades later, I'm listening to rappers who sound like they have down syndrome. Seriously, these idiots aren't even audible. I've listened to the chorus of 'Lifestyle" carefully and I made out three words, max. Rap world, this is unacceptable. Step your effin' game up.
Iggy Azalea feat. Charli XCX 'Fancy'
First things first, you're the wackest. Have you heard this fraud speak in an interview? SHE'S AUSTRAILIAN. Why is she sounding so stereotypically 'urban' on all of her wack ass songs? This is a straight-up mockery of the culture and I won't stand for it. I feel bad for Charli XCX's fine ass who had to try and save this shit with the only thing salvageable about it, the chorus. Even with the vailiant effort, this was still a fail. Oh yeah, I hated 'Black Widow' too, beeyotch.
Jessi J feat. Ariana Grande & Nicki Minaj 'Bang Bang'
The inclusion of this song is important because A) I hate the song and B) I hated everything the featured artists dropped last year. 'Problem', 'Break Free', 'Anaconda'... HATED IT ALL. How anyone can listen to Ariana Grande's voice without their ears bleeding is beyond me. Nicki sounding like a psycho slut on every record? Yawn. And then this catastrophe. Save yourself from these pitiful puppets, Jessi J. Good thing I don't own a firearm or it would be 'bang bang' for real for real. *thug voice*
Pitbull feat. Ke$ha 'Timber'
Pitbull, mi primo! Que paso? For years, you've entertained the universe with your electric energy. But last year? No bueno. Your chants of 'Dale' were finally starting to get stale. Your beat selection, usually top notch, was bottom shelf. And then you got this trashy hoe to sing this horrible hook. Your last album, 'Globalization', was a sign that there might be a sudden end to your Cuban reign. I know this song wasn't on there but it was still the biggest turd you dropped in '14. Ay Dios mio.
Magic! 'Rude'
Just what I wanted to hear, a bunch of reggae-influenced Canadians whining about their future father-in-law. No wonder he doesn't want you to marry his daughter... because of garbage like this. Shit, I'd be rude too if this was my potential son-in-law's plea. I have a handful of Caribbean-themed songs on my iPod but I can assure you, this ain't one of them. The real magic would be if we could make these fucktards disappear.
Jason Derulo 'Trumpets'
Can this guy dance? Sure. Am I hating on him because he was boning that goddess Jordin Sparks? Maybe a lil. But that doesn't change the fact that this is one of the most poorly-written songs in recent memory. 'Is it weird that your ass remind me of a Kanye West song?' Yes, it's fuckin' weird. And borderline homosexual. Why the hell would you write (or sing) such a thing? The songwriter should be banned from ever lifting a pen in his lifetime.
John Legend 'All Of Me'
And here is where the female demographic loses their shit. I fully expect riots over this selection but guess what? I DON'T CARE. Let's call a spade a spade. I love a beautiful ballad as much as the next person, but this overly sappy, insincere ode to his overrated wife? No thank you. I want that Luther-type shit, feel me? I'm sure this song will be played at weddings for years to come, and if you're planning to play this at your ceremony and you want me there, I'M NOT COMING.
OK, let me stop there. I feel my blood pressure rising and I'm not trying to catch a heart attack over a blog. While I take some deep breaths, I hope you enjoy the rest of the day, especially my fellow NYers who are 'snowed in'. *Rolls eyes* Peace, punks.
Thursday, January 2, 2014
My favorite 40 songs of 2013
Remember me? :D
Let's get the obligatory "Happy New Years!' shit out the way. Hope 2014 is kind to ya. Truth is, for all the great shit 2013 brought to me, more blog posts was not one of them. But it's a new year, new me! Just kidding... I hate when people say that. However, I am gonna start on a positive note and give you an original piece... and one that often stirs up some emotion.
It's my favorite songs of 2013!
I doubt anyone besides myself will notice that I didn't post one of these for 2012. Was it because the music was so atrocious that I decided to skip one altogether? No, actually. I have the list, and it's delightful! It may sound like a lame excuse but I just never got around to posting it. I vowed to never make that mistake again so I'm giving y'all muthafuckas this list. Read it and love it.
One slight change from the last time I posted one of these: I made it a top 40 instead of a top 50. This was not something I planned on doing before making the list but I felt like I was reaching by adding on 10 more songs just 'cause. Less is more and all that. To compensate, I added blurbs to just about every song, because I'm sure you wanted to read more of my expert analysis.
As always, a refresher to the criteria: These are MY favorite songs of the past year. Not the BEST. Not the most POPULAR. Just my FAVORITE. (Envision me yelling every time you see something in caps) I write this because while you can offer your opinion and feelings on what your fav jams of 2013 were, this list is hard to debate because it's the shit I like. You'll notice a lot of dance songs on here. Yeah, 'cause a dude was hitting the treadmill hard last year (until that one day in November when I killed it running 3 miles in something like 25 minutes and sprained my foot so bad I could hardly walk on it for the next week). In response to the lack of hip-hop (my preferred genre of music, if you didn't know), I say show me where to get some and I'm there. Unfortunately, I'm not able to be online all day searching for underground shit to satisfy my rap urges (I just put on some 90's shit for that) and the new shit, especially the mainstream stuff, is horrible.
OK, here's the list. Have fun and hopefully I will speak to you guys a lot more in 2014. Enjoy!
40. Bruno Mars 'Treasure'
Saw him in concert last year, amazeballs!
39. Daft Punk feat. Pharrell 'Get Lucky'
How smooth was this? Perfect summer song
38. Avicii feat. Aloe Blacc 'Wake Me Up'
Liked Aloe Blacc ever since 'I Need A Dollar'
37. Haim 'The Wire'
Thought they were strange when I saw them on SNL but this rocks
36. Action Bronson feat. LL Cool J & Lloyd Banks 'Strictly 4 My Jeeps'
Would love to see hear more NY rap like this in '14
35. B.o.B 'Missing'
Underappreciated MC who always speaks his mind
34. Jay-Z 'Picasso Baby'
33. Drake feat. Jay-Z 'Pound Cake'
Surprisingly, my fav MC ever doesn't crack the top 25
32. Big Sean feat. Kendrick Lamar & Jay Electronica 'Control'
Verse of the year candidate by Kendrick. Got damn!
31. Icona Pop 'I Love It'
Two Swedish chicks yelling about crashing their car? Yes, please!
30. M.I.A. 'Y.A.L.A.'
This is what happens when you shazam songs from commercials
29. Jennifer Lopez feat. Pitbull 'Live It Up'
Every time these two hook up, they make it on here
28. Rihanna 'What Now'
Finally dropped as a single. Best song off of 'Unapologetic'
27. Sevyn Streeter feat. Chris Brown 'It Won't Stop (Remix)'
She might not have the best voice but this is so smooth
26. Ludacris 'Hell Of A Night'
Luda always kills these light, fun club songs
25. Britney Spears 'Til It's Gone'
24. Pitbull feat. Kelly Rowland 'That High'
Both dropped at the end of the year but they've been on repeat heavy
23. Sam & The Womp 'Bom Bom'
22. Fergie, Q-Tip & GoonRock 'A Little Party Never Killed Nobody'
This is what happens when you occasionally watch 'Dancing W/ The Stars'
21. Afrojack feat. Chris Brown 'As Your Friend'
20. Will.I.Am feat. Chris Brown 'Let's Go'
Fuck rehab, Breezy. Just make a dance album with shit like this on it
19. J. Cole feat. Amber Coffman 'She Knows'
Couldn't get into the album but this bangs
18. Mack Wilds 'Own It'
This feels so New York. Kudos to the remix w/ Jadakiss, too
17. Kid Cudi 'Young Lady'
'Indacud' was one of my fav albums in '13
16. Eminem 'So Much Better'
When Em drops an album, he's guaranteed a spot on my list
15. Sia feat. The Weeknd & Diplo 'Elastic Heart'
The 'Titanium' chick strikes again!
14. Tegan & Sara 'Closer'
I can now cross 'liking a song by Canadian lesbian twins' off my bucket list
13. One Republic 'Counting Stars'
'No more counting dollars, we'll be counting stars' YES
12. Ylvis 'The Fox (What Does The Fox Say)'
Anyone who knows me knows this could easily be my #1. Hilarious!
11. Calvin Harris feat. Ellie Goulding 'I Need Your Love'
Loved this even more after I saw the video
And now, I present my favorite 10 songs of 2013!
10. Miley Cyrus 'We Can't Stop'
I tried to fight it. I really did. But the fight was not a fair one. For all the negative things I can say about her (and trust me, I realize that she's an industry puppet who's playing out this ridiculous character for attention), I have to give credit where it's due. Shit, even I was twerking to this.
09. A Great Big World feat. Christina Aguilera 'Say Something'
Jay-Z famously said 'sensitive thugs, y'all all need hugs.' Well, dammit, I need a hug and I need it now. Is this depressing? Uhhhh HELL YEAH. This is the song you play right before your disaster of a relationship comes to an end. Pillows are soaking up tears to this shit right here. You're gripping your teddy bear extra tight. But sometimes pain sounds so beautiful.
08. Macklemore & Ryan Lewis 'Can't Hold Us'
Are they corny? Sure. A song like 'Thrift Shop' wasn't going to change that (although I love the message). This? Yeah, this is serious. Any MC who would've rapped over this beat with that hook would've made it into a banger, but they didn't get that chance. Macklemore did. And that makes him one lucky, successful ass dude.
07. Pusha T feat. Future 'Pain'
I hate Future. Seriously, I do. If you replaced him with T-Pain on any song he's on, the song is instantly 10000x better. But that's how much I love this song... that I could bare his down-syndrome sounding ass on the hook. And for that, and many other reasons, Push wins rap album of the year accolades in my book.
06. Joell Ortiz 'Roll Deep'
Let's see what we have in play here: A dope NY MC, who just so happens to be Puerto Rican, rhyming over a hard beat that samples Big Pun AND Frankie Cutlass? How can this NOT be in my top 10? 'I'm in here going pernil, that's one step up from ham'. Songs like this remind me that I still love H.E.R.
05. Drake feat. 2 Chainz & Big Sean 'All Me'
From the moment Drake says 'Got everything, I got everything', you know shit's about to go down. Wouldn't consider myself a fan of any of these dudes but when you can get the best out of all 3 of them over a beat like this with a memorable hook, you have a great anthem.
04. Neighbourhood 'Sweater Weather'
It wasn't until recently (and by recently, I mean last night) that I realized that the lead singer is a dude. And that's probably not a great sign. But trust me when I tell you that something about this song just feels good. Maybe because it feels like California and I was in LA in June (show-off alert!) but I digs this.
03. Robin Thicke feat. T.I. & Pharrell 'Blurred Lines'
Here's where I brag about downloading this song (and not illegally, either!) in April, way before the frenzy. I'm a visionary! May I add that I previously hated Robin Thicke. He didn't feel authentic to me, and in his past efforts he sounded like he was trying too hard. But Pharrell LACED him. Add the simplistic, yet genius video and you have what was possibly the biggest song of '13.
02. Capital Cities 'Safe & Sound'
A cool dude like myself (ahem) listens to cool music. And this, my friends, is cool. Although they're essentially repeating the same four lines over and over again, the vibe of this song (mainly due to the awesome use of horns) is just... cool. Also doubles as one of my favorite videos of the year.
01. Lorde 'Royals'
I remember the day so vividly. I was in the passenger side of the whip, radio on blast, and both Hot 97 and Power 105 (NYC desperately needs a better 'urban' station) had commercials on so I (tentatively) switched to z100. And that's the moment I fell in love with this song. And then Rick Ross added a verse on it and, surprisingly, didn't ruin it. Yes, this song is amazing. Yes, this is my favorite song of 2014. And yes, you can call me queen bee.
Another year, another list. What were your favorites of 2013? I probably won't care but feel free to let me know. Just kidding! Kind of.
Let's get the obligatory "Happy New Years!' shit out the way. Hope 2014 is kind to ya. Truth is, for all the great shit 2013 brought to me, more blog posts was not one of them. But it's a new year, new me! Just kidding... I hate when people say that. However, I am gonna start on a positive note and give you an original piece... and one that often stirs up some emotion.
It's my favorite songs of 2013!
I doubt anyone besides myself will notice that I didn't post one of these for 2012. Was it because the music was so atrocious that I decided to skip one altogether? No, actually. I have the list, and it's delightful! It may sound like a lame excuse but I just never got around to posting it. I vowed to never make that mistake again so I'm giving y'all muthafuckas this list. Read it and love it.
One slight change from the last time I posted one of these: I made it a top 40 instead of a top 50. This was not something I planned on doing before making the list but I felt like I was reaching by adding on 10 more songs just 'cause. Less is more and all that. To compensate, I added blurbs to just about every song, because I'm sure you wanted to read more of my expert analysis.
As always, a refresher to the criteria: These are MY favorite songs of the past year. Not the BEST. Not the most POPULAR. Just my FAVORITE. (Envision me yelling every time you see something in caps) I write this because while you can offer your opinion and feelings on what your fav jams of 2013 were, this list is hard to debate because it's the shit I like. You'll notice a lot of dance songs on here. Yeah, 'cause a dude was hitting the treadmill hard last year (until that one day in November when I killed it running 3 miles in something like 25 minutes and sprained my foot so bad I could hardly walk on it for the next week). In response to the lack of hip-hop (my preferred genre of music, if you didn't know), I say show me where to get some and I'm there. Unfortunately, I'm not able to be online all day searching for underground shit to satisfy my rap urges (I just put on some 90's shit for that) and the new shit, especially the mainstream stuff, is horrible.
OK, here's the list. Have fun and hopefully I will speak to you guys a lot more in 2014. Enjoy!
40. Bruno Mars 'Treasure'
Saw him in concert last year, amazeballs!
39. Daft Punk feat. Pharrell 'Get Lucky'
How smooth was this? Perfect summer song
38. Avicii feat. Aloe Blacc 'Wake Me Up'
Liked Aloe Blacc ever since 'I Need A Dollar'
37. Haim 'The Wire'
Thought they were strange when I saw them on SNL but this rocks
36. Action Bronson feat. LL Cool J & Lloyd Banks 'Strictly 4 My Jeeps'
Would love to see hear more NY rap like this in '14
35. B.o.B 'Missing'
Underappreciated MC who always speaks his mind
34. Jay-Z 'Picasso Baby'
33. Drake feat. Jay-Z 'Pound Cake'
Surprisingly, my fav MC ever doesn't crack the top 25
32. Big Sean feat. Kendrick Lamar & Jay Electronica 'Control'
Verse of the year candidate by Kendrick. Got damn!
31. Icona Pop 'I Love It'
Two Swedish chicks yelling about crashing their car? Yes, please!
30. M.I.A. 'Y.A.L.A.'
This is what happens when you shazam songs from commercials
29. Jennifer Lopez feat. Pitbull 'Live It Up'
Every time these two hook up, they make it on here
28. Rihanna 'What Now'
Finally dropped as a single. Best song off of 'Unapologetic'
27. Sevyn Streeter feat. Chris Brown 'It Won't Stop (Remix)'
She might not have the best voice but this is so smooth
26. Ludacris 'Hell Of A Night'
Luda always kills these light, fun club songs
25. Britney Spears 'Til It's Gone'
24. Pitbull feat. Kelly Rowland 'That High'
Both dropped at the end of the year but they've been on repeat heavy
23. Sam & The Womp 'Bom Bom'
22. Fergie, Q-Tip & GoonRock 'A Little Party Never Killed Nobody'
This is what happens when you occasionally watch 'Dancing W/ The Stars'
21. Afrojack feat. Chris Brown 'As Your Friend'
20. Will.I.Am feat. Chris Brown 'Let's Go'
Fuck rehab, Breezy. Just make a dance album with shit like this on it
19. J. Cole feat. Amber Coffman 'She Knows'
Couldn't get into the album but this bangs
18. Mack Wilds 'Own It'
This feels so New York. Kudos to the remix w/ Jadakiss, too
17. Kid Cudi 'Young Lady'
'Indacud' was one of my fav albums in '13
16. Eminem 'So Much Better'
When Em drops an album, he's guaranteed a spot on my list
15. Sia feat. The Weeknd & Diplo 'Elastic Heart'
The 'Titanium' chick strikes again!
14. Tegan & Sara 'Closer'
I can now cross 'liking a song by Canadian lesbian twins' off my bucket list
13. One Republic 'Counting Stars'
'No more counting dollars, we'll be counting stars' YES
12. Ylvis 'The Fox (What Does The Fox Say)'
Anyone who knows me knows this could easily be my #1. Hilarious!
11. Calvin Harris feat. Ellie Goulding 'I Need Your Love'
Loved this even more after I saw the video
And now, I present my favorite 10 songs of 2013!
10. Miley Cyrus 'We Can't Stop'
I tried to fight it. I really did. But the fight was not a fair one. For all the negative things I can say about her (and trust me, I realize that she's an industry puppet who's playing out this ridiculous character for attention), I have to give credit where it's due. Shit, even I was twerking to this.
09. A Great Big World feat. Christina Aguilera 'Say Something'
Jay-Z famously said 'sensitive thugs, y'all all need hugs.' Well, dammit, I need a hug and I need it now. Is this depressing? Uhhhh HELL YEAH. This is the song you play right before your disaster of a relationship comes to an end. Pillows are soaking up tears to this shit right here. You're gripping your teddy bear extra tight. But sometimes pain sounds so beautiful.
08. Macklemore & Ryan Lewis 'Can't Hold Us'
Are they corny? Sure. A song like 'Thrift Shop' wasn't going to change that (although I love the message). This? Yeah, this is serious. Any MC who would've rapped over this beat with that hook would've made it into a banger, but they didn't get that chance. Macklemore did. And that makes him one lucky, successful ass dude.
07. Pusha T feat. Future 'Pain'
I hate Future. Seriously, I do. If you replaced him with T-Pain on any song he's on, the song is instantly 10000x better. But that's how much I love this song... that I could bare his down-syndrome sounding ass on the hook. And for that, and many other reasons, Push wins rap album of the year accolades in my book.
06. Joell Ortiz 'Roll Deep'
Let's see what we have in play here: A dope NY MC, who just so happens to be Puerto Rican, rhyming over a hard beat that samples Big Pun AND Frankie Cutlass? How can this NOT be in my top 10? 'I'm in here going pernil, that's one step up from ham'. Songs like this remind me that I still love H.E.R.
05. Drake feat. 2 Chainz & Big Sean 'All Me'
From the moment Drake says 'Got everything, I got everything', you know shit's about to go down. Wouldn't consider myself a fan of any of these dudes but when you can get the best out of all 3 of them over a beat like this with a memorable hook, you have a great anthem.
04. Neighbourhood 'Sweater Weather'
It wasn't until recently (and by recently, I mean last night) that I realized that the lead singer is a dude. And that's probably not a great sign. But trust me when I tell you that something about this song just feels good. Maybe because it feels like California and I was in LA in June (show-off alert!) but I digs this.
03. Robin Thicke feat. T.I. & Pharrell 'Blurred Lines'
Here's where I brag about downloading this song (and not illegally, either!) in April, way before the frenzy. I'm a visionary! May I add that I previously hated Robin Thicke. He didn't feel authentic to me, and in his past efforts he sounded like he was trying too hard. But Pharrell LACED him. Add the simplistic, yet genius video and you have what was possibly the biggest song of '13.
02. Capital Cities 'Safe & Sound'
A cool dude like myself (ahem) listens to cool music. And this, my friends, is cool. Although they're essentially repeating the same four lines over and over again, the vibe of this song (mainly due to the awesome use of horns) is just... cool. Also doubles as one of my favorite videos of the year.
01. Lorde 'Royals'
I remember the day so vividly. I was in the passenger side of the whip, radio on blast, and both Hot 97 and Power 105 (NYC desperately needs a better 'urban' station) had commercials on so I (tentatively) switched to z100. And that's the moment I fell in love with this song. And then Rick Ross added a verse on it and, surprisingly, didn't ruin it. Yes, this song is amazing. Yes, this is my favorite song of 2014. And yes, you can call me queen bee.
Another year, another list. What were your favorites of 2013? I probably won't care but feel free to let me know. Just kidding! Kind of.
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